Acel ruminates

As “singles”, most of you are longing to be in a relationship.. to love
and to be loved.. to find the right man/woman and be with him/her for
the rest of your life. God definitely understands our emotions and
desires, He is even the one who instituted marriage; but before we
enter into an exclusive relationship, there are things that we need to
consider. These are some Biblical boundary lines when it comes to
entering a relationship.

In the beginning, when God created
Adam and Eve, he told them that they are FREE to eat from any tree in
the garden BUT they must not eat from the tree of knowledge of good and
evil. Here, we can see that freedom comes with responsibility. God told
them not to eat from that tree to protect them. It’s like a baby
playing around the house. They can play or do whatever they want, but
as a parent, you of course will teach/tell them NOT to put their
fingers in the electric fan or electrical socket because you’re looking
out for them. It’s the same way with God. He has set boundaries for our
own good.

Below are some things to consider in entering a
guy-girl exclusive relationship. I got this from the notes of my friend
(Tanya) when she attended one of the talks about relationships at
Victory Ortigas by Pastor Julius Fabregas a couple of years ago (forgot
what year :P). I added some of my insights and also a bit of my
testimony at the end. Munch in!

1. GODLY DEVOTION

Matthew 22:37-38 “ Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with
all your sould and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest
commandment.”

• The first thing you should be looking
for in a partner is if he/she has UNDIVIDED devotion to God. Anything
that is above your relationship with God is an IDOL. So, if you’re the
first in that person’s life.. have nothing to do with them. Unless he
loves God more than you, don’t have anything to do with them.
• So, are you his/her first love? Or God?

2. GODLY PURPOSE

Proverbs 19:21 “Many are the plans in a man’s heart but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”

• Before getting into a relationship, you and that person should find
out what God’s purpose is in your lives. You and the other person
should have a direction and a vision. Now, who would want to be with
someone without direction or passion? Even before Eve was brought to
Adam, God gave Adam a task/ work to do.

3. GODLY STANDARDS (PURITY AND HOLINESS)

Leviticus 20:7-8 “ Consecrate yourselves and be holy, because I am the
Lord your God. Keep my decrees and follow them. I am the Lord, who
makes you holy.”

Eph.1:4 “ For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight.”

• How does the guy treat you? Like a sister or otherwise?
• I’ve witnessed a couple who loves God who waited till their wedding
for their first kiss. Our friend Pastor Dennis and Tammy respected each
other and honored God. They want to mean the white dress in front of
friends of family. To really enjoy the sacrifice and wait during their
honeymoon.
• Ladies, if a guy tells you “If you really love me, then we should do it”…punch him or kick his balls to mars!

• There should be NO HINT OF SEXUAL IMMORALITY

“ But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or
of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for
God’s holy people.”- Ephesians 5:3

“For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person such
a man is an idolater has nay inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and
of God. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God’s wrath comes on those who are disobedient. Therefore do not be partners with them”-
Ephesians 5:6-7

“ It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in way that is holy and honorable,
not in passionate lust like the heathen who do not know God, and that
in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of
him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already
told you and warned you. For God did not call us to be impure, but to
live a holy life. Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not
reject man but God, who gives you his Holy spirit.” – 1 Thessalonians
4:3-8

(Also read my blog "LUST CAN NEVER BE SATISFIED" for more info about living a life that is pure and holy)

4. GODLY COUNSEL

Psalm 1:1-3 “ Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of
the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of
mockers. But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he
meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water,
which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither.
Whatever he does prosper.”

• Do not listen to those who are not walking in God, they’ll just get you in trouble.
Example:

Girl 1: But I love him, I can’t live without him even if he’s married
Girl 2: If you’re happy, then go for it. Fight for love
….duh?!?

Be accountable to someone who would encourage you and lead you accordingly, not those who doesn’t care with what God thinks.

Proverbs 18:22 “ He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.”

• Guys should do the finding.. that’s your role..
• Women should WAIT.. It didn’t say “she who finds a husband…” The men should stand up and not just wait for the woman to just fall from heaven. Women shouldn’t go flirting.

* No guy has the right to say to any girl “I love you” until he is
prepared to say in his next breath- “Will you marry me?” If you can’t
make the second statement, don’t bother making the first. It isn’t true.

Enjoy life, enjoy being single.. meet people, but under these
boundaries and you will be blessed. If you’ve found someone, pray for
that someone.. ask for godly counsel. That person will not tell you who
you should marry, but they’re there to guide you and give you wisdom.

….. A bit of my testimony about this issue:

I’ve been with wrong and ungodly relationships before, but when I
surrendered my life to the Lord, I prayed and asked him to help me
preserve myself to my husband to be. I made a decision to honor God and
to live a pure and holy life in my thoughts, heart and body, and by
obeying him and letting Him be the first love in my life…

As
I focused on God and be faithful on the things he wants me to do, God
answered my prayer. I married a friend of mine in church, who loves
God. During those times we worked together in the ministry, I didn’t
think of him in a romantic way, but God orchestrated everything, and
both of us were unaware what God is doing… and voila! what a surprise
from God It’s like my eyes were unveiled and God assured me in my
heart that Danny is the one for me… During those times, I didn’t know
that God is doing something in Danny’s heart as well.. but I waited on
God… I can’t tell you the details on how God worked in both of our
hearts, coz this blog will be so looooong… heheh..

And now, I can testify that God is faithful.. as
you delight in HIm, he will give you the desires of your heart. And as
you seek Him first, then every other things will be added unto you as well..
Now, Danny and I just celebrated our 4th year wedding anniversary Our first kiss was when the pastor told him "you may kiss the bride"..
and 4 years later, we still love each other more than ever. We are
expecting our first baby this July

This entry was posted on Monday, May 26th, 2008 at 2:16 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.